Dear Stoner: I recently made the mistake of eating a gummy bear with THC. I have not had any marijuana in years, but I have an upcoming drug test in seven days. Should I be concerned?
Tilly
Dear Tilly: Yes, Tilly, be concerned. Do hash and Haribos just taste the same to you? And who’s the asshole who tricked you into eating one? Address those two issues and you’ll probably never run into this dilemma again. I’ve had tons of idiot friends call me out of the blue, frantically asking if they were “good” after smoking a joint while in the Army or days before a random drug test, and I basically tell them all the same thing: It depends. It depends on your diet, your metabolism, the amount of THC you ingested, how you ingested it, how long since you last ingested THC and, most important, what sort of drug test it is. Drug tests that use hair or blood samples instead of urine or saliva can detect THC more accurately.