A strain with a dessert-like name is nothing new, but some carry more of a nostalgic pull than others. Cookies hybrids with names like Wedding Cake and Thin Mints will always tug at my inner child, and the same thing happened when I saw Cheese Quake on the shelf during a recent dispensary visit.

I’m used to seeing the term “cheesequake” on Dairy Queen Blizzard menus, not at pot shops, so I can’t help but lick my lips as visions of creamy ice cream and cheesecake bites pop up every time I hear or read the word. Although the Cheese Quake strain isn’t sweet and sugary like DQ’s version, it still carries a rich savoriness reminiscent of cream cheese, and its relaxing effects will cool you down after a hot day.

Far be it from a stoner to notice an industry trend, but I couldn’t help but observe that Critical Mass has been taking up an increasing amount of space in local dispensaries. Looking around various pot shop menus online confirmed the strain’s clout in the industry. But is Critical Mass also deserving of critical acclaim?

A friend tried comparing Purple Kush to Blue Moon recently, saying he appreciated both for providing a gateway to craft consumption but had since moved on to more complex options. Say whatever you want about Blue Moon, I told the pretentious douche, but don’t you dare besmirch the Purp God.

Let me explain. Most tokers who started smoking chronic before dispensaries showed up have fond memories of Purple Kush…but who knows if that’s what it really was?

If the pantheon of original cannabis strains named after primates were an Olympic event, Gorilla Glue would undoubtedly get the gold, and Grape Ape would take a strong and solidified silver. While the bronze slot might be up for debate, my vote for the next medal winner would be Kong, the hairy wonder of the pot world.

The hybrid’s complex effects and classic genetics have provided me dozens of stress-free evenings since college, and I’m happy to see it at more dispensaries lately.