My librarian mother taught me never to judge a book by its cover, but anything I put into my body is a different story. It took years for me to get over pea soup’s pukey-green color, and I nearly got cold feet with magic mushrooms after finding out they weren’t just grown in shit, but also still had some shit left on them. While I let those same instincts keep me away from Cat Piss and Chocolope strains for too long, I didn’t make the same mistake with Booger.
A lot of hybrids, especially the earlier ones, were bred to build upon a parent strain’s good qualities while minimizing its undesirable traits. I remember how exciting it was to see “Jamaican Sativa” or “Purple Thai” on coffeeshop menus in Amsterdam, and how disappointing it was to find that these old-timers hadn’t evolved like the potent strains they’ve birthed. San Fernando Valley OG isn’t as old or crusty as Jamaican and Thai landraces, but it’s produced its fair share of wunderkinds while getting unfairly pushed back in the shadows.
My memory was an unstoppable force before I started smoking cannabis. Sports statistics, promises from my parents, painful childhood memories — nothing escaped me. And while all of those recollections from my past remain, retaining random facts and events from the recent past is no longer my strong suit.
Barely hanging on to my short-term memory, I practically ran for the hills when a budtender suggested Amnesia Haze. The most popular form of the headstrong sativa has a combination of purer genetics than most hybrids, but it’s still a hot mess, counting Haze, Jamaican, Afghani, Hawaiian and Laos strains as its parents.
The phrase “drink the Kool-Aid” is commonly used when talking about letting hype or peer pressure affect a decision, but it has pretty morbid origins. The saying stems from the 1978 Jonestown tragedy, in which over 900 followers of cult leader Jim Jones died from drinking a cyanide-laced version of the juice mix. Don’t let that stop you from enjoying a glass at your next cult meeting, though: Just add a little more sugar, and that cyanide tang will go right away.
Cannabis’s federally illegal status makes it difficult to conduct licensed clinical research on the plant and products made from it, hampering medical and commercial advancements in cultivation, extraction and ingestion. Colorado legislators got tired of waiting for the feds, and in May passed a bill that allows for state-approved research and development licenses for clinical studies on potency, chemical composition, agriculture and other areas.
After a week of nothing but clean, active highs from Lamb’s Bread and a few days off the flower during a family trip, going back to a strain with a lineage stretching further than a sequoia would’ve been too much for my simple mind to process. It’s hard to find something easygoing yet delicious in an industry focused on potency, but with nearly 175 retail dispensaries open now in Denver, I was bound to come upon at least one rose among the weeds.
Changes to Colorado’s cannabis industry are on the horizon. The Marijuana Enforcement Division has been holding meetings for industry stakeholders and government officials in order to iron out the details of recently passed laws and new regulations, and the public is encouraged to attend those meetings and provide input.
If you consume cannabis legally as an Arizona medical-marijuana patient, Arizona State University wants to study you.
And you’ll get paid for using cannabis.