Browsing: Growing

black mamba strainHerbert Fuego

Kobe Bryant chucked a lot of junk at the hoop and had poor stats in clutch moments, but his delusional fans still try to inject his name into conversations about LeBron and MJ. (Feel free to email me your hot takes that argue otherwise.) Needless to say, I’m not a fan. So when I saw a strain named Black Mamba — the nickname of the all-time clunker — I abstained. But then a plump, purple cut on display at Verde Natural persuaded me to give it a try.

Like most egotistical turds without any friends to give him one, Kobe had to adopt his own nickname, one that he thought signified how his superior competitive ability would finish his opponents with the venom-like ferocity of an African snake. The Black Mamba strain, however, is anything but forced, with at least three different variants all deserving of the moniker. 

witches weedHerbert Fuego

Despite being inspired by real-world events, witches were always the lamest Halloween characters. Warts on their noses, shrieking voices and no taste in color — no, thanks. But then I saw Hocus Pocus on the Disney Channel, and that Bette Middler was sure a delight. I had high hopes that Witches Weed would be just as delightful.

A hybrid of Chemdawg D, Cinderella 99, OG Kush and San Fernando Valley OG, Witches Weed certainly sounds like it was brewed up in a cauldron, and its funky high is almost supernatural.

cheese quakeHerbert Fuego

A strain with a dessert-like name is nothing new, but some carry more of a nostalgic pull than others. Cookies hybrids with names like Wedding Cake and Thin Mints will always tug at my inner child, and the same thing happened when I saw Cheese Quake on the shelf during a recent dispensary visit.

I’m used to seeing the term “cheesequake” on Dairy Queen Blizzard menus, not at pot shops, so I can’t help but lick my lips as visions of creamy ice cream and cheesecake bites pop up every time I hear or read the word. Although the Cheese Quake strain isn’t sweet and sugary like DQ’s version, it still carries a rich savoriness reminiscent of cream cheese, and its relaxing effects will cool you down after a hot day.

purple kushHerbert Fuego

A friend tried comparing Purple Kush to Blue Moon recently, saying he appreciated both for providing a gateway to craft consumption but had since moved on to more complex options. Say whatever you want about Blue Moon, I told the pretentious douche, but don’t you dare besmirch the Purp God.

Let me explain. Most tokers who started smoking chronic before dispensaries showed up have fond memories of Purple Kush…but who knows if that’s what it really was?

kong strainHerbert Fuego

If the pantheon of original cannabis strains named after primates were an Olympic event, Gorilla Glue would undoubtedly get the gold, and Grape Ape would take a strong and solidified silver. While the bronze slot might be up for debate, my vote for the next medal winner would be Kong, the hairy wonder of the pot world.

The hybrid’s complex effects and classic genetics have provided me dozens of stress-free evenings since college, and I’m happy to see it at more dispensaries lately.

303 ogHerbert Fuego

I’m a fan of Colorado-centric strains, so I was surprised when a friend recently pointed out a glaring omission in our strain-review archives: 303 OG. Unlike Colorado Cough or Commerce City Kush, 303 OG (also called 303 Kush) has a reputation outside of the state, where it’s known for its Pre-’98 Bubba Kush and Chemdawg genetics as well as its social effects. But as with just about anything that’s become a local legend, some of 303 OG’s backstory is disputed.

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