Browsing: Growing

black_cherry_ogHerbert Fuego

Soda was recently cut out of my diet, but giving it up wasn’t hard; candy, pie and cereal are much more important to my sweet tooth. The few times I do indulge in a pop, however, I like to go with the old-school varieties, like root beer, cola or red, orange and original cream sodas. Black cherry is another great choice, highly underrated and hard to find — to the point of having to buy it in an overpriced glass bottle at the grocery store.

Or you can find an alternative for your favorite flavor in the cannabis world (or at least fool yourself into thinking that). So I was interested to see whether Black Cherry OG would provide a worthy substitute for that old soda flavor I craved.

pot_zero_slideshow-2Jake Holschuh

Unlike fruits and vegetables at the supermarket, organically grown marijuana doesn’t have labels announcing the clean growing practices used to produce it, because the plant is still federally prohibited. Tired of waiting for national acceptance, the Cannabis Certification Council, a Denver-based cannabis sustainability and fair trade organization, has announced its own organic certification process for legal marijuana growers.

According to CCC board chair Ben Gelt, applying for the program’s organic certification is similar to applying for traditional organic growing certifications: After the CCC receives the application, third-party certifying entities will conduct inspections and audits for several months before deciding whether applicants become accredited.

o many Sesame Street characters are iconic. Bert and Ernie. Oscar the Grouch. Back in 1977, Big Bird was on an iconic Sports Illustrated cover with tall, shaggy-haired Detroit Tigers pitcher Mark Fidrych. Elmo was responsible for an all-time toy craze in 1996. And still, none of them compare to Cookie Monster.

Toddlers loved that blue fur and simple vocab. We envied his diet, and some of us still do. But as parents start watching the show with their kids and reconnect with Cookie Monster, some see a sad reflection of addiction and America’s sugar intake — or maybe that’s just the ranting of someone stoned off his ass on Cookie Monster, a Herculean strain with alleged Girl Scout Cookies and OG Kush origins that I’ve been smoking a lot lately.

beerweedWestword

Two of Colorado’s most popular party favors are teaming up to reduce carbon emissions. Denver Beer Co. and the Clinic, a marijuana dispensary chain with several growing operations, have partnered in a recycling program aimed at reducing carbon dioxide waste across both the craft-beer and cannabis industries.

Unveiled by Governor Jared Polis and the state departments of Energy and Public Health and Environment on January 29, the new pilot program allows brewers to capture the CO2 byproduct of their brewing processes and then ship it to marijuana growers, who will use the gas as a supplement to boost their plant yields.

737222a5-bcfe-4c52-a18c-37b833a28cb7Herbert Fuego

I had eleven family members in town for a week during the holidays, and about half of us smoke pot. Safe to say, I made a lot of dispensary runs for edibles, which are are still exotic foreign goods to out-of-staters. During all of this shopping for candy bars and gummies, I couldn’t help but notice the same weed-jar label at four or five stores around Denver: Bazookies.

Bazookies isn’t named after the giant à la mode cookie sliced like a pizza (that’s a pizookie), nor is it the same as Zookies, a mix of Animal Cookies and Gorilla Glue #4. No, Bazookies is a hybrid of Bubblegum and Girl Scout Cookies, in which old and new genetics meld into a relaxing yet productive high that works almost any time of day.

desert_rubyHerbert Fuego

The realization hit me like a depressing hailstorm: I’m old. It wasn’t the receding hairline, or the weird looks that college Chads and Beckys gave me after I accidentally bought (and used) student tickets to a Colorado State University basketball game. It’s the pain. Oh, baby, do I hurt. Both elbows, a shoulder and a wrist from getting hit by various things with wheels or legs over the past few months. Sleeping on my neck wrong or walking a couple of miles in Vans can make the next day a pain in the ass.

This new, never-ending fight with a slower healing process rekindled my interest in high-CBD strains, which I’ve generally avoided after discovering some trustworthy CBD oils in an effort to curb my smoking. And let’s face it: CBD strains generally smell and taste like booty. Finding one that doesn’t smell like an old sock can be a challenge. However, there are some tastier exceptions, like Terrapin Care Station’s Wife Lemonade, or Desert Ruby, a Colorado creation that has been flying under my nose for at least three years.

stoner (8)Westword

As America’s knowledge about the plant grows, the range of subjects our Stoner handles have expanded. While most of the questions we received in previous years asked such things as how to roll a joint or if it’s possible to boof marijuana (it is, but be careful), 2019 queries ventured into slightly more intellectual subjects, such as the recent vaping health crisis, or what the point of useless “indica” and “sativa” designations really is.

As we enter a new year full of unknown and new mysteries, here are five of our most interesting and popular Ask a Stoner questions in 2019.

hemlockHerbert Fuego

We all have weird personal connections to certain words that cause us to hate them. I’m not talking about squirming when you hear “moist,” but about opinions that date from childhood, like my dislike for “hemlock.” Even before I knew the word’s definition, hemlock sounded like some fatal coughing disease from the 1600s, or a foreboding local swamp in which Timmy Flanagan drowned.

I wasn’t terribly off: Hemlock is a poisonous plant, notorious for being brewed into tea that was used to execute Socrates. It’s also the name of a shitty horror show on Netflix, the first (and last) heavy-metal band I saw live, and a popular weed strain in Colorado. As a result, my relationship with “hemlock” has gone from blocked to online lurking through dispensary menus.

sunsetHerbert Fuego

Daily commuters deserve more sympathy. Not only will the stress and time-suck of rush hour shave years off your life, but the drive will also rob you of the simple things, like daytime television, regular happy hours and the sun. Remember the sun? Anyone who’s out the door before 7 a.m. and off work after 5 p.m. during the winter knows how draining life can be without sunlight, whether you believe in chakras and things that retrograde or not.

It might not be as sexy as scurvy, but Vitamin D deficiency is serious stuff, so in Colorado we make our own ultraviolet rays. Just look in a stoner’s basement, and you’ll find several hundred watts of them. We also make our own indoor sunsets, for about $35 an eighth.

four_kingsHerbert Fuego

Remember Three Kings, the 1999 movie about the end of the Gulf War? Underrated flick: George Clooney, Edward Norton, Ice Cube, Mark Wahlberg and Spike Jonze all in one great cast, before any of them peaked, showing nine-year-old me just how fucked up the world is.

Discovering a strain with the name Four Kings had me wondering if a direct-to-DVD sequel to Three Kings starring Dolph Lundgren or Randy Couture was ever made. No such luck — which is a shame, because Four Kings is a great strain for zoning out with a B-grade action movie before bed. It’s also great at helping me get over shitting ma britches as a nine-year-old after seeing well-acted depictions of graphic and intense violence, according to the Motion Picture Association of America.

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