Across the pond this weekend, The Daily Mail (aka Britain’s version of Fox News) dropped their version of a bombshell story, claiming that they had found the source of the scourge of high grade weed that they claim is infesting their countryside.
A news rag known for its hardline conservative slant, The Daily Mail is hardly a trusted source for reliable cannabis news, or really any news for that matter, but their alleged insight into the growing pot market is so completely ass-backwards, it is really no wonder that the UK trails so far behind the US when it comes to cannabis reform.
The piece begins by describing a character known as “the Big Buddha”, identifying him as one Milo Yung.
Yung, they say, is virtually single-handedly responsible for “flooding the UK” with the seed form of his prize-winning “Big Buddha Cheese” cannabis strain.
In the UK, possession, sale, transport or cultivation of cannabis is strictly illegal – but somehow, cannabis seeds are sold openly online and in High Street head shops.
Commonly classifying the genetics as “souvenirs”, some savvy businessmen have exploited a loophole in the laws, successfully claiming that selling a seed does not equal selling some weed.
The laughable Daily Mail article goes on to assert that by importing and distributing his “Big Buddha Cheese” cannabis seeds, that Milo Yung is personally responsible for an “explosion of up to 500,000 cannabis farms” across Britain.
Their hackish investigation of Yung led to the party island of Ibiza, in Spain, where Yung openly flaunts a lifestyle full of Moroccan hashish and presumed opulence – and if there is one thing that the Daily Mail really hates, it is other people having a good time.
A 10-pack of Big Buddha’s beans will set you back £55.00 – or around $85.61. The Daily Mail goes on to warn that those ten seeds translate into £40,000 – or $62,259 – of illegal drugs being grown per year.
Bunk seeds, large overhead costs, and the potential for a completely failed crop aside, let’s assume a cannabis connoisseur in the UK does get through a successful harvest…what’s the big deal?
Again, the article claims that “Hundreds of thousands of suburban houses across the country have been converted into hidden marijuana factories”, without bothering to provide any sort of source to back it up.
Instead, they turn to a lady named Mary Brett, supposedly a chairman of something called Cannabis Skunk Sense. Mrs. Brett has no love for the cannabis plant, and sees entrepreneurs like “Big Buddha” as a threat to her version of an ideal society.
“It’s just contemptible,” says Brett, “I’ve got absolutely no time for these people. They don’t seem to care that kids’ and families’ lives are completely ruined.”
In a stereotypically British rant, she continues, “At the expense of all these kids, ruining their lives, they’re living the life of Riley. This loophole for cannabis seeds needs to be closed now before we go any further, before any more kids’ lives are subjected to the awful damage. Cannabis acts as a gateway to harder drugs. We’ve got members in our charity who’ve had children start on cannabis, go on to a harder drug and they’ve died. We have several bereaved parents.”
Gateway drug?
Bereaved parents?
Life of Riley??
Don’t look for The Daily Mail to make sense of her ramblings. They are too busy giving precious copy space to another pot-hating concern-raged British bird by the name of Susan Bedack.
Bedack had her 29-year old son committed to a looney bin based on a case of schizophrenia that she says was induced by his years of smoking weed.
So what advice does a woman who tossed her own son into a straightjacket over a joint have for Queen Elizabeth when it comes to these seed-slangers?
“They should be locked up, absolutely,” she says, “But that’s not going to happen because we’re too soft in this country.”
“Too soft” she says while her adult son is bouncing off of rubber walls because of a plant.
It is hard to blame her when the British media plagues the airwaves with half-baked stats and overblown warnings about the dangers of “skunk” weed.
The Daily Mail article refers to high grade weed as “hallucinogenic”, blaming it for an “epidemic of mental health problems among users”.
Meanwhile, their own stats, much like those here in the US, show that as teen marijuana use slowly rises, it is heavily offset by staggering drops in the use of actual hard drugs like heroin, crack, and tobacco.
When you think about it, perhaps Milo Yung should be a candidate for the Victoria Cross if he “singlehandedly” helps to keep countless young Brits away from rocks and smack.
Until then, he will continue to sell his skunky Cheese seeds as “souvenir bird food”, laughing all the way back to the bank in Ibiza.