Author Toke of the Town

img_2820Herbert Fuego

Did you ever eat generic cereal out of a bag instead of the expensive stuff out of a box? They basically taste the same — but still, something’s not right. That’s because our snooty minds are triggering a knee-jerk reaction, making us think that brand names and pretty packaging matter. But do they? Is there really a difference between the fancy and the generic?

I used to view Jet Fuel in a generic-cereal kind of way — as a poor man’s Sour Diesel, thanks to growers trying to flood us with too much of a good thing. The strain’s Diesel genetics give it the same pungent, fuel-like smell, and its buzzing effects are similar to those of one of America’s favorite sativas — but every time I smoked it, I couldn’t help but note that Jet Fuel just wasn’t Sour Diesel. (Now you’re probably thinking the same thing your parents did when you were too good for the Fruit Spins bag with no toucan on it: What a prick. And you’re right.)

ask_a_stonerWestword

Dear Stoner: Why do you and all of the media refer to marijuana buds as “flower”? The flowers on the marijuana plant are produced by the male plant. The real magic happens when you successfully eliminate all of the males and their flowers and keep the females from getting pollinated.
Old-School Grower

Dear Old School: Some older growing guides refer to a male plant pollinating a female (resulting in a seed) as “flowering,” but that isn’t the case for the majority of cannabis literature nowadays. And while you’re defining a marijuana flower as when a seed is born, the true definition of a flower is “the seed-bearing part of a plant,” so that doesn’t mean an actual seed needs to spawn; it just has to be something that blooms, and that includes the buds we smoke. Also, most marijuana growing guides recognize the term “flower” in both female and male plants, with the female version turning into resin-coated calyxes and the male turning into a seed. That’s why so many grow guides refer to the last six to ten weeks of growing as the “flowering” stage. Some growers even refer to the stage as “blooming.”

make-my-dayPhotos by Thinkstock/Photo Illustration by Jay Vollmar

The shooting last weekend of two teens who allegedly tried to heist marijuana plants from a backyard grow in the Whittier neighborhood, which left one fifteen-year-old dead and a fourteen-year-old boy critically injured, is hardly the first bit of mayhem in Colorado over a pot grow, legal or otherwise, and it probably won’t be the last.

Police believe that Keith David Hammock, 48, fired on the two youths with a .22-caliber rifle from a second-story window as they were seeking to flee over a fence.

picmonkey_collageWilliam J. Sisti, Larry Johnson, Ken Lund and Don Graham

Cities and counties across Colorado have ballot measures related to marijuana regulation. Many of them involve adding additional sales taxes or excise taxes, which are paid when unprocessed marijuana is sold or transferred from a cultivation facility or site to a retail store, manufacturing facility or another facility. But there are also measures that would allow — or ban — the sale of marijuana altogether.

The towns of Palisade, Dinosaur and Englewood are considering allowing retail stores within town limits, while Pueblo voters will decide whether to ban all retail marijuana sales and production in Pueblo County. The only marijuana-related measure on Denver’s ballot concerns public marijuana use in designated areas. Here are the details, county by county: 

ask_a_stonerWestword

Dear Stoner: I have bouts of nausea for days sometimes, and I’ve heard that pot tea can help. Do you know how to make it? I live in Colorado, so it’s legal here.
Blizz

Dear Blizz: You’ve heard correctly — pot tea can be a marvel for those suffering from nausea. But since water isn’t a strong enough solvent to boil for extraction, making a cup is not as simple as putting ground-up pot in a teabag with boiling water. If you’re good using milk or butter in hot drinks, you can make a chai tea or latte by whipping up your own infused butter or milk: Mix ground herb into a simmering pan of milk or butter and let it heat on low for a few hours, then strain out the pot and add the liquid to your hot beverage of choice.

420_eric_7Eric Gruneisen

Cannabis and music have always gone hand in hand, but even since Colorado legalized recreational pot use in 2012 with Amendment 64, it is still illegal to consume cannabis in public and in private businesses that are accessed by the public – including concert venues.

This November, voters in Denver will have the opportunity to address the issue with Ballot Question 300, which, if passed, will create a pilot program that allows limited social cannabis consumption in permitted private establishments.

Get back to the island with Maui Wowie.Herbert Fuego

Get back to the island with Maui Wowie.

In this age of instant development, Hawaii has a timeless quality. The culture, pride and desires of its people have kept the non-resort areas true to their roots, for the most part — which is probably why you’ll hear natives muttering things you hope you don’t understand as you pass by them on a local beach. (Did he just call me a “fucking haole”?) Still, it’s their island, and most of us are just visiting for our own selfish pleasure, so I’m cool with the overprotective measures. It’s all about preservation.

ask_a_stonerWestword

Dear Stoner: I have a drug test in a week and smoked weed ten days ago. I hadn’t smoked for a while before that. Will I be good? Should I be worried?
Prickly

Dear Prickly: It depends on what method the drug test uses to detect THC. If it’s a common urinalysis (piss test), you should be fine. According to the National Drug Court Institute, new or infrequent smokers are generally clean after four days, but that can change based on metabolism and smoking frequency. Still, you should chug water, pee a lot and sweat more until your test, just to be safe. But all you master cheefers out there thinking it’ll only take you a week to pass your piss test for a new job should think again: Everyday users usually have THC in their system for at least two months, but it can stick around for up to four months.

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