Browsing: Dispensaries

super silver hazeHerbert Fuego

Strains that stand the test of time merit proper respect. Seeing a jar of Super Silver Haze gleaming on a dispensary shelf slapped that sentiment into my skull on a gloomy Monday afternoon, just when I needed something to brighten my day.

If you feel like Super Silver Haze has been around for a while, you’re right. The strain rose to popularity in the mid-’90s, reportedly bred by Green House Seeds, the Dutch breeding company also known for its Strain Hunters web series.

fox.street.wellnes.buds.bud.bars_slentzScott Lentz

It came down to the last month of the year, but 2018’s dispensary sales ultimately edged out the previous year’s total for Colorado. According to the state Department of Revenue, Colorado pot shops have sold over $6 billion worth of legal marijuana since retail sales began on January 1, 2014.

For the fifth year in a row, annual dispensary sales reached a new record.

greaseballHerbert Fuego

The Sopranos just celebrated its twentieth anniversary, and I’m re-watching it for the first time. On top of making me crave baked ziti and manicotti, the show has me laughing much more than it did the first time around. Maybe it’s just the binge factor, but now The Sopranos basically seems like The Simpsons with a Mob twist and good acting.

Suffice it to say that the Mafia was on my mind during a recent dispensary visit, so Tony Soprano’s balding head probably influenced my interest in Grease Ball, a sweet, pungent strain known for its calming effects and trichome production.

banana ogHerbert Fuego

Banana flavoring has never been my favorite — we’ve been over this before: Banana-flavored treats aren’t worth the cellophane they’re wrapped in — but it does have its place in the cannabis world. The overripe-banana flavors in Banana Kush and Strawberry Banana pair exquisitely with the skunky, earthy notes of cannabis, and those strains deliver mellow highs that are perfect for relaxing after work. Unfortunately, it’s hard for Denverites to get past anything more than flirtation with banana-inspired strains, as those two are about the only ones you’ll find in the local dispensary market — but there is a third, albeit scarce, option: Banana OG.

chemmy jonesHerbert Fuego

I’ve fallen prey to Chemmy Jones not once, not twice, but three times now. I can’t help myself, and neither can my nose. Those gas fumes keep fooling me, like some sort of horticultural hormone.

Chemmy Jones actually hails from the United Kingdom, where Connoisseur Seeds created the buzzing hybrid. Some online descriptions call it a “functional” strain, but I strongly disagree.

pineapple chunkHerbert Fuego

Pineapples have become too trendy. Don’t believe me? Go to a Target or H&M and you’ll find button-up shirts, shower curtains, cups, underwear and loads of other generic shit decorated with little pineapples. The same people are also abusing cacti — though they probably don’t even know that word and just call them “cactuses,” which is fucking wrong.

I refuse to let commercialization destroy my love for all prickly plants, including cannabis (anyone who’s trimmed weed knows how prickly trichomes are). Hit by full empathy for all three during a dispensary pit stop on my way home last week, I bought an eighth of Pineapple Chunk in the hopes of enjoying a relaxing evening.

beijinhoHerbert Fuego

Your boy got a big new TV for Christmas. She’s a real beaut, with all the apps. So many that I feel like a king, conquering the cable swine with my ability to use other people’s Dish and Xfinity accounts to watch cheesy action movie after cheesy action movie. Muscles, explosions and one-liners from Cruise, Stallone and Schwarzenegger. Give them to me. Now. With a blunt of Beijinho.

A Portuguese term for “baby kiss” or “little kiss,” the word “beijinho” is also associated with a Brazilian birthday candy made with coconut. I first found the strain on a hung-over Sunday morning, while wearing a sheen of self-regret and my clothes from the night before. A gentle kiss sounded like exactly what my lungs needed. Beijinho was sold to me as a 50/50 hybrid, bred from pure Afghani and Thai landraces for a simple yet effective high and delicious Durban-like flavor with a salty back end.

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