Dumb Teen, Looking For Marijuana, Steals Tomato Plant


The Jason Show

​A 15-year-old Florida boy climbed into Angela Cartwright’s kitchen window, planning to steal a marijuana plant, but instead the clueless young would-be thief stole a potted tomato plant, according to a sheriff’s arrest report.

As the not-too-bright teenager ran from Cartwright’s house near Holly Hill, Fla., on February 10 just after 7 a.m., he even yelled back at the homeowner, “See, I have one of your pot plants,” the arrest report states, reports Lyda Longa at The Daytona Beach News-Journal

Cartwright, 35, had arrived home that morning after leaving her six-year-old son at the school bus stop. When she walked inside, she saw a teenager whose torso was inside her kitchen window and whose ass was hanging outside, the police report indicates.

Avenue 25
This isn’t the guy who did it, but we’re betting he looks at least this dumb.

​When Cartwright understandably yelled, “Hey!” the teen jumped back and made a run for it, the potted tomato plant gripped tightly in his thieving little hand.
“I chased him and I yelled out, ‘You stupid little brat, it’s a tomato plant!’ ” Cartwright said on Thursday.
“It wasn’t pot; it was just Walmart tomatoes,” Cartwright said with a laugh.
The teen got away, but Wednesday morning as Cartwright and a friend walked Cartwright’s son to the bus stop, they spotted the same IQ-challenged teenager for a second time, the police report shows.
The moron was wearing the same clothes Cartwright had seen on him five days earlier, she said.
“I said to my friend, ‘That’s him,’ ” Cartwright said. “It looked like he was going to hide from me, but then he stayed there.”
The boy, who the News-Journal didn’t identify because he’s a minor, admitted to stealing the tomato plant, valued at less than $5.
“He seemed like a nice kid,” Cartwright said. “It almost seemed as if he wanted to get caught.”
While Cartwright, her friend and the teenager tomato bandit waited for a deputy to arrive at the bus stop, the Cartwright took the opportunity to give him a good talkin’ to.
“I gave him the ‘mother lecture,’ ” Cartwright said. “He listened and I told him he should be in school.”
The teen was charged with unarmed burglary of an occupied dwelling, the first offense on his criminal record, according to the police report.
The young suspect, when interviewed, told a cop the same thing: He broke into Cartwright’s house thinking he was going to steal a marijuana plant, the report shows.
“Oh come on kid! Don’t tell the police that!” writes Kyle Munzenreider at Miami New Times. “Why would you do that? Just tell them you really wanted to make your own fancy ketchup, but your parents refused to buy you your own tomato plant or something. Don’t make it any worse.”
“Kid probably swears he gets hangover from root beer,” Munzenreider writes.
The teen was taken to the Volusia Regional Juvenile Detention Center in Daytona Beach, where, no doubt, he’ll learn how to be a better criminal next time.