Author Mike Adams


When a member of stoned society makes the decision to travel with a small stash of weed, he or she has made a risky decision to tug at the short-and-curlies of law enforcement and challenge them to a drug war duel. It’s simple, you are trying to make your way across town to get stoned with your buddies, and the meathead police are trying to stop you from having a good time. The whole goddamned scenario is essentially what would happen if the reality police show ‘Cops’ and a video game such as ‘Grand Theft Auto’ had a one night nipple twisting lust fest and nine months later, one of them popped a bastard love child. That’s exactly what trying evade law enforcement while smuggling dope is: a spontaneous fling between the asshole of reality and a program that can be learned and ultimately, beaten like a borrowed mule. Here are 7 tips for how to do that shit right the first time.


Life’s a beach, and then you’re high. This was perhaps the credo of a group of young New York City lifeguards who were busted smoking weed over the Independence Day holiday while they sat in a car during their lunch break.
Reports indicate that six city beach attendants had apparently gone off on a Fourth of July safety meeting when a nosey officer with the New York City Police Department swooped in and caught them giving a demonstration on how to resuscitate a drowning joint – just in case it gets fish lipped, we suppose.


Stoners using Twitter to spread the good word of the ganja may be influencing the youth of America to get high on marijuana. At least this appears to be the consensus of a recent study from the Washington University School of Medicine, which finds that social media messages pertaining to marijuana are reaching hundreds of thousands children in the United States every day.

The California Highway Patrol playing tough-guy dress up and photo shoot with taxpayer money all to intimidate YOU.


The American SWAT team has become a domestic extension of the United States military, conducting seek and kill thrill missions that have cost an increasing number of the average citizen in this country both life and limb. Not only are these raucous foot soldiers of the War on Drugs gaining sustutnance from their gnawing wrath against dark skin poverty, but their cutthroat infiltrations are without regard for public safety and ultimately, making enemies of a population they are paid to serve.
This is the consensus of the American Civil Liberties Union, whose recent study, entitled “War Comes Home: The Excessive Militarization of American Policing,” paints a vile portrait of the Land of the Free by revealing how state and local law enforcement agencies are bribed by Uncle Sam to make drug busts in exchange for federal funding – an incentive program that has armed local yokel police departments to the teeth. The ACLU finds this military-grade arsenal is in the hands of lunatics who have accomplished very little but a violent onslaught of no-knock savagery that has invoked fear and panic throughout entire communities.


It never ceases to amaze us the despicable lengths law enforcement officers are willing to go through to establish probable cause for a search. Throughout the years, we have heard horror stories about these bullheaded, sarcastic bastards using every ridiculous means possible to destroy the property of citizens in hopes of making a big drug bust. Fortunately, there are those particularly interesting situations in which despite the officer’s raging hard on and gnashing teeth, the search comes up empty handed and a lawsuit follows.
That is exactly the deep shit situation a pair of Utah state troopers have found themselves drowning in ever since giving 54-year-old Sherida Felders a savage roadside shakedown based on her possession of air fresheners, religious paraphernalia and a couple packages of beef jerky. Now, two law enforcement weasels are left wishing they had never messed with a citizen as litigious as she is God-fearing.


Myles J. Ambrose, one of the paranoid forefathers of the American drug war, died earlier this month at the age of 87 in Leesburg, Virginia. Although, throughout the years, there was speculation that bookies were taking wagers on who would be the first to dance on Ambrose’s grave: a prominent Mafia family or a Mexican drug cartel, in the end it was a heart attack that led to his demise.

Flickr/VMiramontes-TokeoftheTown.com


If you’re a longtime toker, you’ve probably been there: bag of weed is empty, resin in the pipes is charred out and you’ve got to find something to puff on. Maybe you didn’t always maintain your personal integrity while scouring the city streets looking to score a bag of grass, we get it.
But while some of us are guilty of our fair share of shady and sometimes morally-skewed indiscretions as a result of the search for more ganja, it’s still weed and pot users aren’t normally doing crackhead-like things to get their fix like shaking down an elderly funeral home director. Or, at least that’s what we thought.


Under normal circumstances, marijuana is a weed of pacifists and does not, in any way, lead to the shrieking threat of violence. However, in the lunatic clutches of two brothers with more red-eyed testosterone than anything resembling common sense, we suppose then, and only then, is this magnificent flower capable of being hazardous to someone’s health.
Just ask 33-year-old Florida resident Jackie Brown, who was savagely beaten over the weekend with several cannabis plants after he and his younger brother, 31-year-old Rodney Brown, allegedly got into a knuckle-headed argument over what appears to be the family business – an illegal marijuana grow operation.

What’s not to love about a product that both increases the intensity of an orgasm and gets you stoned at the same time?
Enter entrepreneur Mathew Gerson, who recently launched a marijuana-infused sexual lubricant for women called Foria, which is essentially an intoxicating concoction of cannabis and coconut oil that will not only grease up a couple’s organ grinding rituals but also allegedly heighten their overall sexual experience, especially for the woman.

Mark Ramsay from Flickr. Image altered by Toke of the Town.


South Salem High School in Oregon recently forced one of its seniors to admit to being under the influence of marijuana, but even though he was not, and has since provided school officials with a negative drug test to prove it, the school still refuses to grant him permission to participate in the graduation ceremony.